my love story

ini cerita tentang cinta saya...
ini cerita tentang hati saya..yang sekarang breaking into thousand of pieces..
ini cerita tentang sy..yg dah hilang arah hidup...
it's been a year..living in life like this..
sekejap dalam mimpi sekejap back to dunia reality..
it hurts..im breaking into thousand pieces...
it hurts sayang...
so much....
i tak tau i nak hold kat sape..i nk grab sape..
i dun trust anybody...sume nak tinggal i...
u pun kan..u ckp u love me..but she's just xbebaloi for u to let her go..
then let me go..it hurts so much...
it hurts so much sayang..more than you could ever imagine...
i bukan robot...i manusia...ade hati dan perasaan...
i tipu sume bile cakap i ok..
i tak mungkin akan buat hati you susah..
i tak mungkin nak buat you sedih bile i cakap i tak ok..
bia i sorg je yg hurt cmni...
i tanak you tau...im breaking into thousand pieces..
i sendiri tak tau mane i..
mane diri i....
im lost...im lost and hurt.....

it takes me sometimes to realise that pain can actually come with pleasure...

the pain i had inside...i like to see myself suffer..it makes me stronger..but sumtimes weaker...

even when im having pain..one thing you should noe..that ill always be there for you as long as you want me too...

i never demand you to love me as i do....

even sometimes...when you say all those sweet things..either you meant it or not..i dont care..i can live with it..

even you didnt meant it and i noe it..ill still pretend to have faith on it...

to see you happy..is my mission..

the reason to stay alive..the reason to be alive..is to see you go through your life happily..

so it doesnt really matter either you are with me or not..what does matter is that you are happy..

n i have made a promise to myself..ill do everything i could to make you happy..

even if you want me to beg to the one you love so much to forgive you and accept you back..ill do it...i ll..as long as you are happy..

love is a gift..to be love is a bonus...i dont really think i deserve the bonus..so ill just accpet the gift the way it is...im not asking for the bonus..i swear....

just let me have this gift..n i swear ill take good care of this gift...

you have been the one for me to stay alive..and i dun need your sympathy on me...

im fine by my own...

it the life i choose to live with till the rest of my life..

you shouldnt be sorry for me...i made my decision..n my desicion is to dedicate my life in loving you...and i am not going to ask you to the same...just let me love you..in my way....

10 days

today..it has been 10 days of us from our breaking off thing..
eventhough kite dah overcome it..(as if overcome means overcome)..
em..are we actually in the right path..
the right direction of this relationship..
sumtimes,it drive me crazy to put myself in this...
a relationship..ke? or juz a bond tied by us..
because we both need each other..because we never been alone so far..
i have actually..
ke actually cam traped in our own thoughts of our own definitons of love..
urgh...
im just a mistake kan??
when are you going to realise it ha??
then u will vanish n go away and disapear???
damn! i should have thought about this kan..
all those nitemares yg i dpt tiap2 mlm..
it will come true kan?
u r leaving me one day....
and that sucks! sigh
-end-

love??

why do people make love??
sebab cinta ke lust???
suomen said that sum people are confuse..
sbb tu they make love..
sbb they are confuse...
they dont noe what they really want actually..
katekanlah laki tu confuse with a girl..
pastu they make love..
end up laki tu tak love pun pompuan tu actually..
and mesti die blah tinggal pompuan..
so..what's the point of making love??
is that girl hanye mistake laki tu..
poor that girl...a mistake..of a man..
who doesnt even think about that girl punn sebenarnye..
poor girl.... "sigh"

sources : articles n novels

a break off

semalam you ask me for a week off..
a week of breaking off this relationship..
a week of staying away from each other..no calls no messages..
i thought i will be just fine handling everything..
adapting my life to this situation..
but i guess life without you is so much more miserable than what i could think..
there's alot to write down but i only have little time...

you and i 1

you and i both..jason mraz..

Was it you who spoke the words that things would happen but not to me
Oh, things are gonna happen naturally
Oh, taking your advice and I'm looking on the bright side
And balancing the, the whole thing
Oh, but it often times those words,
they get tangled up in lines
And the bright light turns to night
Oh, and until the dawn it brings
Another day to sing about
the magic that was you and me

Cause you and I both loved
What you and I spoke of
And others just read of
Others only read of the love, of the love that I love
Yeah, la la la la

See I'm all about them words
Over numbers, unencumbered numbered words
Hundreds of pages, pages, pages forwards
More words than I had ever heard and I feel so alive

'Cuz you and I both loved
what you and I spoke of
and others just read of
and if you could see now
Oh, love loveYou and I, you and I
Not so little you and I anymore, mm, mm, mm
And with the silence brings a moral story more importantly evolving
is the glory of a boy

'Cuz you and I both loved
what you and I spoke of
and others just read of and if you could see now
well then I'm almost finally out of
I'm finally out of
finally, de de de de de de
Well I'm almost finally
Finally well I am free, oh I'm free

And it's okay if you had go away
oh, just remember the telephones
well, they workin' 'em both ways
but if I never ever hear them ring
if nothing else I'll think the bells inside
have finally found you someone else and that's okay
cause I'll remember everything you sang

'Cuz you and I both loved
what you and I spoke of
and others just read of and if you could see now
well then I'm almost finally out of
I'm finally out of
finally, de de de de de de
Well I'm almost finally
Finally well out of words.

you

my special someone..
im in love with you each and every second...
everyday..bgn pagi..the first thing yg cross my mind is you...
dear..loving you each day brighten my life so much...
i miss you...

dear..
you mesmerize me with your hazel eyes....
when looking at you....perasaan tu terase indah sgt...memukau...
your wavy black hair..looks lovely..with your cute face....
i just cant forget the way you make all those lovely faces with your cute wavy hair...
your smile...it's my suppliment to keep me alive...
youve got the most lovely smile i ever saw...
seeing you laugh..it makes me thrilled and happy....

dear...
for all those moments we shared togather..
i wont ever forget...
mase you hug me and say that you will always be by my side...
i wont ever forget that moment....that promises we made for each other...
i love you..nd will always love you forever....
even we arent meant to be togather........